I will prevail

Breakdown…? FUCK THIS SHIT.

Had a massive emotionally distraught moment just then, I raged and I kind of sprang my finger while slamming down books and stuff. My mum’s a busy lady and I get that, I was home alone the whole day and I had to look after the shop, for about 5 hours. I couldn;t exactly study because my brother took my laptop to work and there’s two PC’s but I couldn’t be on them because I had to look after the shop. I got SO ANGRY at around 4:30pm when my mum still hadn’t come back and I realized that I’ll have to pull an all nighter again tonight. I GOT SO ANGRY, it reminded my of year 12 again, I was all alone and there was so much fucking shit going on at the time, I couldn’t really study and it hindered my scores. I looked at the UNSW and I missed out by 0.05 to be considered for a course, no matter how well I do at uni they will not consider me because I was 0.05 off. It just fuelled my rage, I HATE how I have to be affected in my studies. If they let me have a good environment and less responsibility I could do whatever I want!!!!!

But no, they had to FUCK THINGS UP FOR ME.

No matter what, I;m going interstate next year, to do what I want to do. 

If I can’t get into medicine next year, I’m probably going to obliterate myself.

Anyway, I just got 100 for all the additional credit point quizzes for a unit I’m studying and that’s a bit reassuring but SIGH**** I CAN’T BELIEVE I’M IN UNI AND THIS SHIT IS STILL HAPPENING.

They should know that I get emotionally distressed too, if I hadn;t gone through the shit in year 12, SIGH…whatever. The past is the past.

I’m only ever going to look at the future now, fuck the past and fuck everyone!

I HATE EVERYTHING ATM. ESPECIALLY THIS SHITTY LITTLE NOTEBOOK THING, the keyboard is so ARGH.

Okay, be that way? I just want to be friends now. Why…oh…you feel uncomfortable about me now? Okay, I’ll make sure to never ever let my existence bother you. I’ll push you out my life too.